March 7th, Good Friends in LA (old entry)

March 7th

Gosh. For the first time in my life I feel like I have really deep friendsss my age. A bunch of them. In LA. What a huge blessing. 

The difference it makes to be on the same spiritual page as another is substantial. I grew up with 4 sisters and now I’m surrounded by brothers and the family keeps getting bigger. 

From what I’ve observed, it’s rare for men to have close friends who you really go deep with. Others have told me this has been their experience as well. It’s likely you could have spent most of your life hanging out with someone but you always just get together for some laughs, or the game, or for meal time, and that’s it. 

I heard once that guys take breakups actually much harder because they typically have no one they are willing to talk stuff through with. I definitely believe that. 

It makes sense tho. I’m a dude. I avoid unnecessary drama like the plague. 

The problem is that with this comes the tendency to conceal things that weigh heavy on you. It’s a manly and honorable trait to be self sufficient, not being a burden on anyone. But it’s also manly to be able to listen and share the experience you’ve gained—to train and instruct, to guide and lead. When we conceal from those closest to us, we deny them the opportunity to be a leader in the friendship. 

Everything is an exchange. I’m learning this.